Death Babble — The death of
deconstructionist Jacques Derrida didn't exactly leave me prostrate with
grief (to borrow the phrase once used about Scarlett O'Hara's brief and
innocuous displays of mourning). But I will sort of miss having him around.
He was, after all, the Platonic form of everything ripe for ridicule in academic
life. I'll go farther. I can say (with a little funerary exaggeration) that Derrida
taught me how to think. I saw that he was wrong about everything, and in
figuring out exactly how anyone could be as wrong (and as boring) as he
was, I learned a great deal about thought and logic.
What struck me about his death, however, was the fact that it was
announced by the office of the president of the French Republic, which also
provided a pseudo-philosophic account of his stature and contributions. "In
him," quoth Jacques Chirac, "France gave the world one of the greatest
contemporary philosophers, one of the major figures in the intellectual life
of our time. . . . Through his work, he sought to find the free movement which
lies at the root of all thinking."
Nonsense. If Derrida "sought" anything, it was to show that nothing that
anyone thinks has any form, integrity, or definite meaning. He preached the
great truth that we are all fated to careers of incomprehensible
("indeterminate") babbling, remarkably like his own. But again, it was the
news of the mountebank's death being announced at the highest levels of
government, the idea of it booming down from the Elyse Palace like a
thunderbolt from Jupiter — that was what tickled my funnybone.
Suppose Americans carried on like that.
"THINKER SUCCUMBS TO STOMACH AILMENT. The White House announced
today that Michael Moore, a giant of contemporary thought, has died in rural
Michigan. The cause of his demise was given as an unsuccessful attempt to
devour a steer. On the night before his death, Moore suddenly walked off a
lecture stage in Kalamazoo, saying he was going out for a snack; the body
was discovered some hours later. 'In him,' President John Kerry said,
'America gave the world a role model of gargantuan proportions. Through
his work, he sought to find the hatred and envy which lie at the root of
political aspiration. He found them, and thereby taught us all.'"
"DIVA MARRIED FOR TENTH TIME. The White House announced today that
singing star Madonna has been wed. The ceremony, conducted at the
Voodoo Church of Cleveland, Ohio, united her with her longtime companion, a
life-size statue of herself. 'In her,' President Hillary Rodham said, 'America
has given the world one of the greatest contemporary theologians. . . .
Through her work, she sought to find the genital stimulation which lies at
the root of all religion.'"
"MESSIAH BORN TO HUMBLE FAMILY. The White House announced today that
John Fitzgerald Skakel Kennedy, future president of the United States, has
been born to Sen. Ted Kennedy and an unnamed intern. The 19-term senator
was reported doing well. 'Let the word go forth,' Press Secretary Dan Rather
announced, 'that the torch has been passed to a new generation of
Kennedys — born in this century, schooled by cash, disciplined by hard
and bitter lapses of publicity, proud of their ancient vices, and unwilling to
witness or permit the slow undoing of those family perquisites to which this
nation has always been committed, and to which we are committed today at
home and around the world.'"
Well, why not? Clearly, as Monsieur Derrida discovered, those old ideas
about the subversive potential of philosophy and art were just, well, so
many meaningless ideas. "The free movement which lies at the root of
all thinking" can be found right down the hall from the president's office.
— Stephen Cox
| Jo Ann
Skousen is a writer and critic living in New York bio.
|
|
Anybody but Hillary — It's
election time, and the sidewalks around Columbus Circle, Times Square, and
Lincoln Center are teeming with fresh-faced young college students
earnestly urging pedestrians to support their efforts to defeat George Bush.
Knowing how discouraging it is to be ignored when one is full of missionary
zeal, I always stop to talk with them. "Tell me more," I urge. "Why should I
vote for Kerry?" Inevitably they respond, "Because we have to defeat Bush."
I nod my head in agreement and say, "Yes, I know, I'm not very happy with
Bush either, but tell me, what do you like about Kerry?" The response is
always the same: a blank look of utter befuddlement, followed by, "Because
he isn't Bush."
In two months of asking this simple question, "What do you like about
Kerry?" I have not received a single reason why supporters support him.
They don't know anything he has done or anything that he plans to do. They
just know that he isn't Bush, and that's good enough for them.
Well, Michael Jackson isn't George Bush either, but that's not a good
enough reason to elect the little pervert. Yet I have to admit that this may be
my precise argument four years from now, when I will be urging all of my
friends and acquaintances, "Anyone but Hillary." I will be as anxious and
earnest as these young college kids. But how will I answer when they ask
me about the alternative?
That's why it is essential that Libertarians, Republicans, and anyone else
whose mantra is "Anyone but Hillary" begin looking now for a candidate they
can fully support, one who is articulate, principled, and available.
As for this year's Libertarian choice: Michael Badnarik may be articulate,
but who would know? Since his nomination in May, Badnarik has been
virtually out of sight. I haven't seen or heard any media ads, nor has he
pushed for news interviews. I received one fundraising letter in June and
responded by email, asking to be kept informed of his campaign and
appearances. Shouldn't that have put me on some kind of email list? But I
haven't received any electronic information or requests for help. I went to a
meeting here in New York where he was supposed to speak, a great
opportunity to share his philosophy with a group of high-powered political
types. But he cancelled at the last minute when he missed his flight. How's
that for planning ahead?
If we want to defeat Hillary — and we must — we have to
present a capable, intelligent alternative. The hunt is on. — Jo Ann
Skousen
| Michael
Drew a writer living in Berkeley, Calif. |
|
The "V" Word — Supporters of the
war in Iraq usually scoff at the inevitable comparisons with Vietnam. In one
sense they're right: the scale of ongoing combat operations in Iraq is
obviously far smaller. In Vietnam we were fighting both a national guerrilla
insurgency and a sustained conventional war against a well-equipped
enemy backed by our Chinese and Soviet superpower foes. As a result, U.S.
troop commitments and casualty rates were far higher for far longer than
anything we'll ever see in Iraq (before we get the hell out, that is).
Yet several disturbing parallels have plainly been emerging. The first
was evident during the big coalition offensive into guerrilla-held Fallujah
back in April. From all reports, approximately 50% of our new Iraqi Army
allies either refused to fight or even tried to help the other side, leaving U.S.
forces to do all the heavy hitting. Sound familiar? Once again this people
whose freedom we are reportedly fighting to defend don't seem to be
willing to fight or die in great numbers themselves. U.S. military spokesmen
tried to spin the episode as merely revealing the need for more training of
local forces, but the problem clearly seems to be one of heart —
something the local opposition (once again) appears to have in ample
supply. Reports from more recent battles suggest the new Iraqi Army has
been fighting better of late. Maybe so, but then we've heard that before,
too.
I thought of the "V" word again recently after hearing a returned soldier
on TV talking at length about his Iraq experience. The most rewarding task
his unit got to perform was bringing presents to a Baghdad orphanage,
where they struck up instant friendships with the resident kids. One day they
returned and, to their utter surprise, were told never to come back. It turns
out the insurgents had contacted the orphanage staff and informed them
that if they cooperated with the Americans again, the children would all be
killed. The Americans never went back.
As in most countries, the majority of Iraqis — many of them
nonpolitical folk — probably just want to follow the path that keeps
them out of immediate trouble, and the insurgents know it. As in Vietnam, all
the billions in American aid and invincible conventional military power
cannot change the hearts and minds of people who are successfully
terrorized — and thus controlled — by opposition forces we are
apparently unable to control. It may be a small-scale military action at the
moment, but it sure looks like a big disaster looming. — Michael
Drew
| Tim Slagle is
a stand-up comedian in Chicago. |
|
Fly the Fatwa Skies — After being
forcibly removed from a plane in Maine, musician Yusuf Islam was surprised
to learn that his name had been added to the "no-fly" list, joining such
luminaries as Osama bin Laden and Teddy Kennedy. Older readers might
remember Yusuf by his original stage name: Cat Stevens. He had a string of
bland light-rock hits in the '70s that were briefly popular with acne-ridden
Catholic guitar musicians for their underlying spirituality and their
simplistic, easily-learned chord progressions. They were pop songs that
could be played during guitar masses, and they made those masses seem
less dorky.
When Cat converted to Islam and changed his name, most of his fans
wrote him off entirely. It was not unusual for musicians in that day to join
strange religious cults — George Harrison had set a precedent. Cat
probably would have vanished into obscurity, had not the Ayatollahs issued
a fatwa against Salman Rushdie in the early '80s for writing "The Satanic
Verses." When questioned about the order to kill Rushdie, Yusuf Islam said it
was absolutely valid.
I've always questioned the authority of governments to issue a death
order, and although I remain undecided about the issue, I most certainly do
not believe that any religion has such authority. I find that authority even
more suspect when the alleged crime is composition. If such an order is
valid, shouldn't we be able to issue a fatwa against the man formerly named
Cat Stevens for the way his first few albums insulted rock 'n' roll? —
Tim Slagle
| | |
