A while back, the Kenyon Review warned prospective contributors that it “does not read unsolicited manuscripts during the months of April, May, June, July, August, December, and January, but we appreciate your interest and hope we will hear from you at a later day”; reminding all of us eager suitors to keep firmly in mind exactly which months the Kenyon cats are not in heat.
Since university-based quarterlies have never been too swift at responding to submissions anyway, so dependent are they upon unwieldy committees for decisions, it’s hard to see what is gained for a magazine to announce so much inconsiderableness in advance. Perhaps nothing inflates a magazine editor’s self-image more than announcing his or her idiosyncratic schedule of hibernation, forcing prospective contributors to remember not only the editors’ names but also other personal details. (“Hey, Jack, can you remember whether Judy is in heat in June?”)
